Posts filed under “Film Reviews”
Torso
Usually when we induct a Pooke Hall of Famer, it’s a shocking revelation. Mostly because it means we’ve recalled to update the site. Make no mistake about it though! As far as I am concerned, there is no greater honor and dignity that can be given to a person or in this case, an arguably […]
Friday The 13th Mega Overload
Initially, I was going to review all of the Friday the 13th movies for – get this – Friday the 13th. This idea has never ever even been conceived of before and so I truly felt like a pioneer who was breaking new ground. Then I gave up. So here is a really quick rundown […]
Clive Barker is a Skinless Dragon
Do you ever come upon something that is actually kinda terrible, but for whatever reason you enjoy it anyway? Hellraiser is like that for me. A guilty pleasure; though luckily I don’t feel very guilty about it. I was only recently introduced to these movies, and I haven’t watched them all, but we’re only going […]
FFG, yo
Have you ever watched a movie . . . . Wait for it, guys. That was not the question. (Patience. Geez) Have you ever watched a movie, specifically one of those action-type ones, and it mainly features a bunch of tough, muscley, man’s-man type men? Maybe it has a bunch of really hot, scantily clad […]
Leatherface: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3
I have bad days, like any person on this big blue rock. To be fair, mine aren’t things like “I hope I can feed my children tonight” or “How am I going to tell Grandma I sold most of her medication to my punk rock friend, Jer-Bear, who only has one pair of jeans?”, it’s […]
Sleepaway Camp 3: Teenage Wasteland
I have goals in life, like anyone else. Unfortunately, my goals usually revolve around finding who’s killing the cattle at midnight on Fall Out: New Vegas or drinking the most beer out of a 30 pack that I didn’t pay for. It still feels good to meet those goals though and today, I will review […]
Creepshow
I bought a lot of basketball cards as a kid. Used to trade them with a few mutual basketball lovers and what not. Occasionally, I would get into a swap off with a friend who didn’t watch basketball, but bought cards anyways as a means to communicate with our group. I did the honorable thing […]
Splice
Splice was dead in the water before it even got a chance to swim/mutate and develop gills so as to avoid drowning. A bizarre concept combined with an awful marketing campaign destined the movie to go down in violent flames and that it did, nearly taking Adrien Brody’s super nose with it. It’s an unfortunate […]
Sleepaway Camp 2: Unhappy Campers
The economy is failing, the unemployment rate continues to climb and my pizzais too hot to eat at the moment. God, I can’t stand it. I’m just so hungry, my body famished from a night of drinking Moosehead beer and a vodka so cheap that I never did see any identifying markers on the label […]
Sleepaway Camp
Should the time come that a person wants to graphically murder me, I hope that we some how end up having our final confrontation at a camp. I would be afraid for my continued existence obviously, but I think the pure rush of running cabin to cabin as an axe wielding malcontent gives chase would […]